Why you shouldn’t become wind, and instead shop online

So, I was planning on finishing my vacation story from here, but I can just do it now – it was great, we had good time, we took awesome pictures, find me on Instagram.

It’s been very much back to work, and all that other stuff people call adult life. Except, I’ve been sick with a severe cold for these past couple of days. And the backstory to this is important. On Friday night it was super windy, and we had a few drinks to drink with my significant other. And at one point I came up to him and said “I know what I want to be in life’ and he said ‘What?’ and I went ‘I WANT TO BE THE WIND’ and waved my hands in a wind like fashion. Because I’m sure if the wind had hands he would copy my moves like there’s no tomorrow. Fast forward two days later, and I wake up with a throat pain like a bitch. I mean immediately, I went yup this is one of those colds where you’re not exactly dying, but every one of your breathing whole starts malfunctioning intermediately to let you know you’re that closer to heaven, or hell, or a mystical place where atheists go. I’m not exactly religious.

So, it’s safe to say I’m not the wind. And all of you at home should restraint from becoming wind because consequences are real, and possibly deadly. I mean seriously, this advice is priceless, but somebody should totally put a price tag on it  and pay me. Please?

Anyway, I refused to be sick for two whole days. I went on functioning, and going to work, and getting my new iPhone. Which I totally did, and it was time for an upgrade after two years, and I’m so excited about the gazillion functions it has that I’ll never use. I just promised myself that this time I’ll commit. And I will really learn all the swiping techniques it has and saves 0.3 seconds from the valuable time I could already be purchasing something online.

Speaking of which. I did make an online purchase recently that I’m super proud of. I got myself a big girl linen sheets. Because we sleep in them every night, and it’s an important part of your life, and wellbeing, and that thread count is probably directly related to the amount of times you get laid, so heeeey. I got my ‘luxury’ sheets from Brooklinen. And I did this due to an extensive amount of research prior. NOT. I just found it amusing as The Booklynite in Brooklyn to be sleeping on Brooklinen. ARE YOU NOT ENTRERTAINED?

The sheets came out really nice. Like seriously, I even told my mom and she was super proud.

If you’re looking for something to watch on Netflix, definitely go for the Maniac. If you’re looking for something to read, read books on Bipolar because I’ve been doing a lot of that, and kind of forgot why. And if you’re waiting for fall foliage pictures, them suckers are coming soon baby.

Having said that, I missed being here.

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