Oysters and the Rope

I have some good news, and bad news. Good news is I’m going on vacation, bad news is you’re not. Or actually you might be going on vacation also, but like not with me. Because that would be weird. I’m going to London, and I am pretty psyched about it. Mostly because literally everybody will be talking with an accent. And British accent is one of my top ten favorite things ever. And I really hope I pick up some, if not, all of that fine accent for the duration of this trip, that way my return back to New York would be super confusing. It’s a win-win situation.

For the time being, I’ve been mostly preoccupied with a shit ton of adulting stuff, like I checked my credit score this morning. I don’t know who I am anymore.

But this weekend I’ve got to enjoy some summary activities, and I have to say they are a lot more fun if your body is not pale and dreary looking. Which I can only assume because what I got were some occasional stares that were borderline ‘should she even be in the sun?’ Maybe I should, maybe I shouldn’t, but I’be been rolling with the whole pale, royal look mostly because I don’t have much other choice. Also because genes. Also me having zero patience for tanning. BUT thanks god for vampire movies. That Bella person really put sickly into sexy. And for that I’m grateful.

I started a new painting, but it’s not finished yet so I don’t even know what’s the point of telling you. Maybe I’ll feel obligated to finish it now. Like that ever worked. But seriously some peer pressure is needed, otherwise my painting utensils will be laying around the floor for the long weeks to come. My household will thank you.

I got to enjoy some fine raw oysters on Sunday. And I never before thought I’ll put the two into a single sentence. Probably because consuming raw oysters in Brooklyn would mean nothing but a life gamble combined with a severe diarrhea. I sure missed out on that adrenaline rush.

That same day we went around all the Home Depot stores in proximity, looking for rope. I can’t tell you what we needed the rope for, but let’s just say it was not completely legal. I am kidding, and we needed this specific type of rope for a DYI project we were working on around the house. And as it turned out, we’re pretty picky about our rope , or other people just happened to be working on the same exact project because almost every Home Depot was out it. And the one where we found it had it all bunched up, and unmeasured. So we ended up making the two reps stretch it down across the isles, and measure it with what looked like a wheel thingy. They were pretty awkward about it too, it was a sight to behold. They did turn down my offer to video them, and become internet famous. And I can only assume, they still work at the same Home Depot.

And after, we were driving in the car and my significant other suggested I call my next blog post ‘Oysters and the Rope’, and it made total sense in a way that makes no sense at all.

Oysters and the Rope it is.


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One thought on “Oysters and the Rope

  1. You could have just shared the rope story and the oysters and left it at that and I would be jealous of both of those things. Good oysters are wonderful and hard to find, and getting a couple of Home Depot guys to awkwardly measure out rope for me would make up for all the times I’ve had to hike five or six miles through that store to find someone who could help me.
    But then you have to start with the fact that you’re going to London and next to that all the other stuff only sounds moderately awesome.
    Fun fact: one of the earliest mentions of Guinness stout in print is a news item about Prime Minister Disraeli dining on oysters and Guinness at a restaurant after parliament had adjourned for the day.
    Also it’s been much too long since you’ve shared a painting. Since you’re not taking me to London sharing a new painting is the least you could do.
    Also I feel like I should have written this entire comment in the verse form of Carroll’s “The Walrus & The Carpenter”. Let’s see…
    This blogger was going to London,
    Where they talk in a clever way.
    She’s flying from West to East,
    To find a place to stay,
    Rather than going to Australia
    Where tomorrow’s already yesterday.
    Christopher recently posted…Just The Two Of Us.My Profile

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