I’m a Fairy Godmother. Without the fairy part

So, this weekend I became a godmother. I became a godmother to the same person that made me into an aunt. And if you’re confused, I became a godmother to my niece. It’s not that hard (also, I wrote about her arrival here). So this little person is giving me titles left and right. For free. Which is awesome. Unless, I’m getting the invoice in my mail in like 20 years from now. In which case, joke is on you niece/goddaughter, I might not be alive in 20 years, your invoice will go unanswered.


Family finances aside, this Sunday we had a beautiful ceremony of christening the munchkin. And I got her the dress for this occasion. So, you know she looked rocking good. She also screamed her head off through most of the ceremony, but at least she looked good doing it. And supposedly you can’t just give the baby back to mom in this case because that’s sort of the idea behind becoming a godparent, the child needs to be able to rely on you. I honestly didn’t know about this rule beforehand. I mean I’m all pro for the child to rely on me, but I need to have the option of returning the child back to its original owner in times of distress. And a screaming baby classifies as the time of distress. All I’m saying is I feel like I went into this contract without the proper due diligence.


I am joking of course, and I took on this responsibility full force. I held that baby, and rocked her, and tapped danced (and I didn’t know I can tap dance), and swayed, and got jaggy with it, maybe that last part you’re not supposed to do during a church ceremony. Too many rules. Also, I might have gotten scolded by a priest at some point for fixing her dress instead of paying attention to an important prayer. The way I see it, every prayer is an important prayer. But the dress is not going to fix itself. Also, I paid for that dress it needed to look perfect.


Speaking of perfection, how come the picture taking part is sometimes longer than the actual ceremony? If anybody ever finds out, do let me know.


And then we had a fairly large celebration in a restaurant because I’m pretty sure that’s how your christening gets activated. The church part is just a premise. And then you need a large gathering of people to eat and drink in your honor and the blessing becomes complete. Don’t quote me on this though. Not an expert.


But it was actually really fun. I got to see a bunch of people I rarely see. And I got to show off my exquisite dance moves. Sorry you missed it.


I do have a statement to make. At one point the toasting part began. And they were running short of volunteers. And so then my sister immediately gave me the look. You know the look – ‘get the fuck out there, and say something breathtakingly nice’. And I guess it is expected of me because I have this blog. But can I go on record and say that blog writing and toast giving are two completely, unrelated, literary techniques. Because they are. I don’t drink every time I finish a post. Maybe I should. And then I’ll become good at toasting too.


But It was a great day. And today I am sleep deprived, and my hands hurt from holding the baby. It’s not easy being a godmother.


And now a toast! Not really. More like a picture.


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