Feeling sad and insecure? Furniture assembly might be the answer

If you ever have trouble imagining how to spend a cloudy, gloomy weekend, just buy yourself some furniture and spend the whole day putting it together. Throw in the mix your boyfriend’s mom, that you met for the first time, and that should be complete. You might detect some irony in my words, but in all honesty I can recommend furniture assembly as a nice ice breaker. Everyone is occupied with instructions and providing the best interpretation of what attaches to where. That is if you know what you’re doing. Otherwise I suggest you rely on some expert help or hire some Mexicans (I’m not being racist, I really do regard them as hard workers). This activity will also easily replace your normal workout routine. And the strangest body parts will hurt the next day from assuming positions that otherwise are not normally performed. I’m still talking about assembling furniture, you imaginative perverts.

Do reward yourself with a movie marathon in the evening. For us it was Mad Max and Ex Machina. Both completely legally purchased on the Internet. I felt this disclaimer was necessary for legal purposes and what not. You can safely watch both. You have my expert opinion and green light to do so. Our movie choices were not exactly intentional and conscious. Just sort of watched what everybody was ‘buzzing’ about. You know, to stay in the trend. But now that I think about it, both movies had a common theme going. We are all fucked as a human race one way or another. A reassuring good night’s thought after a nice physical labor infused day.

On a Sunday I got to feel like a normal person. We went to eat at a Vietnamese place. And I really do like their food. Or at least whatever version of real Vietnamese food they serve in Brooklyn. I’m not going into detail on that. But more importantly I got to update my Intagram feed.

Civilization came rushing back into my life.
P.S. Vietnamese food is also great if you happened to drink three bottles of wine the previous night and might be feeling some residual effects of guilt and regret.

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