Death Valley – remembering to be alive

Death Valley vacation happened, and it was a success with only a few minor meltdowns, all completely justifiable. Not according to my significant other, but who’s asking him. It’s not like I sat down in the middle of desert yelling ‘this is fucking disappointing’. Which I kinda did, but more on that later.

Firstly, the airport. You see, I never had a fear of flying or anything remotely related, but after the incident turns out I do now. Particularly going through the security check. Because I now carry a hefty dose of prescription drugs with me at all times, I was super paranoid they might start asking questions, and I’ll act suspicious, and they’ll do an anal cavity search. An actual thought that was in my head. Laugh all you want, but I made it through security check shacking like a leaf, with a tightly clenched butthole. Nobody seemed to notice.

Victory was all too sweet. And it was. For our flight got canceled. But thankfully we were rescheduled to a different one. But never mind that one was delayed so that we were missing our connecting flight to the final destination. Meaning we were forced to go back home, and re-do the whole procedure the next morning at 5 am. I was numb with exhaustion.

The next morning the whole shacking, butt-clenching procedure repeated, and nobody seemed to notice again. And we made it onto our flight, which was surprisingly uneventful, and onto our final destination of Las Vegas. I breathed a sign of relief thinking we made it, but then I thought we made it to a completely unfamiliar city and there was nothing comforting about that. At least my anal cavity was safe for the time being.

We picked up our rental car, and drove off into the  direction of the Death Velley. Or something. My significant other had our routes all mapped out, I was left to my own devices, dreamily gazing outside the window, waiting for paranoia to catch up at some point. It didn’t. The more we drove through the deserted vast open lands, the calmer I felt. It truly felt meditative. And I will probably repeat this just about any place we got to visit. But it was true. Void of people, or other loud, bright, moving objects, it was just super chill.

We drove for about two hours (stopping to get snacks, and pee, if you must know) until we got to this place. International Car Forest of the Last Church. And whoever came up with that name alone is just brilliant. And it was cars dug into the ground, and spray painted in the middle of nowhere. It was supper eerie, and super cool. And yes, meditative. It is definitely now one of my most favorite places.

Then we ate a fairly decent meal at this tiny diner, which also turned out to be our last fresh meal for the duration of this trip. The area is truly, hardly populated, and is only littered with abandoned trailers. Gas stops had to be carefully planned throughout the trip. And we were lucky to grab fridge sandwiches whenever possible. Not that I’m complaining, but junk food overload definitely happened.

That night we made it to our resort, which was fairly decent, and had a pool. But was super overpriced for what it offered. Choices are scarce and they take full advantage of that. Having said that, I slept like a baby.

But not for long because we had plans to wake up with the sunrise the next day. And we did that at Zabriskie Point, which offered a nice overview platform for exactly such endeavor. Add meditative.

At this point and all the way going forward I noticed, there weren’t a lot of tourists, like at all. Not a single child in sight. And also most of them were Europeans from Northern countries like Sweden, Norway, Finland, and France. I guess they come for warmth, and bad food. God bless America.

Then we went to check out the Devil’s Golf Course. Which was cool. Meditative? Safe to say so.

And then we drove to the Badwater Basin. Which is really just a dried out salt lake. And it involved like a 5 miles hike in scorching heat, but since we did it before 10 am so it was barrable. Google says it is the lowest point in North America. I guess I’ve hit mine for the second time this year. Anyway, it was so worth it. I’ve never seen anything like that in my life. It felt like I was inside discovery channel. I mean I’ve watched discovery channel high, but this was that much more better…..AND meditative.

We took a well deserved siesta at our resort. Had a swim, took a nap, and ate some more junk food. And planned our sunset at the Sand Dunes.


It was fucking amazing. And that other word. To be continued.

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